Lunk

Wakey Wakey – 1996

It was in 1996 when LUNK were approached by Pigguns team The Benthole Bangers to write and record a sports song for them, an anthem if you will. The result was this, a catchy but slightly hostile song summing up the sportsmanship you’d tend to find at a game of Pigguns.

I was interested in finding out more about this Pigguns sport. Freck and Cooper go to a match every Sunday afternoon and are massive Bangers fans. They took me along with them to a game. Here’s what I picked up…

The umpire places a pig in the center of the pitch, shouts “Piggy in the Middle” and squeezes an old fashioned bicycle horn. The pig is wearing a helmet with a spear stuck to it, it’s adorable. The two opposing teams, at the sound of the horn, run towards the pig. A player will grab hold of the pig and toss it between various players. Once in a good position, he’ll hurl the pig towards a giant scoreboard, with hope that the pig sticks into it. There are other rules which people seem to enjoy arguing over… such as the ‘Pig Stop’, ‘Snouting’ and a ‘Squealy Feels’. I think the latter is where a player tickles the pig in hope its squeals would put off his opponents. A match can last anywhere between 30 minutes to 3 hours. The final horn is squeezed when the drama and tension is high enough to make the game seem worthwhile.

Freck had gone to the toilet during a ‘pig stop’ and I bought two posters from one of the merchandise stalls. One of the Bangers captain Freddie Flawless and one of Rashers captain Pete Sake. When Freck had returned and seen what I’d bought, he grabbed the Rashers poster and tore it up. I later found out from Cooper that this Pete Sake guy had, in the past, not only stolen Freck’s fiance Mindy Twice but stabbed and killed his brother Frank Sepsis. Sake had since served a life sentence in prison for his crime and was only recently released. Returning straight back to playing for the Rashers. Luckily though the Bangers had won and Freck had cheered up. We all walked out singing Wakey Wakey with loads of other fans. Oi Oi Oi!

Below:
1) Wakey Wakey lyrics.
2) Poster of the Bangers’ cheerleaders ‘The Chipolata Sisters’ that came free with the cassette single.
3) A photo I took outside Clumzo Stadium.
4) A Pigguns programme I picked up from the game.
5) The posters I bought from the game. (I took back the bits from the Pete Sake one that Freck had torn up, and I taped it back together)
6) My dad’s old Pigguns sticker album.
7) An old Pigguns Programme from Cooper’s private collection.

Here’s the front page of a newspaper from 1995 where Freck’s fiancé, Mindy Twice ran off with Rashers captain Pete Sake. This ultimately led to Freck and Mindy splitting up.